“Finish The Deed” (comedy) 1 minute

August 28, 2006 by The Monologue Blogger

Filed under 1 Minute Monologues, MB Library, Male Monologues - Comedy

Character: CHARLIE
Description: Charlie tells his friend that his son is becoming a man.
Gender: Male
Age: 41

My son is growing up quicker than I could have ever of anticipated. Just the other day, I was doing some yard work out here. Planting all kinds of new shrubs and flowers I bought over at Home Depot. You know, for the wifey…make her happy.

My son comes running over to me. But he’s running like he’s gotten hurt real bad. So I’m thinking, is this a broken bone, a bruised hip, a busted rib…had no idea. But it looked serious. So I throw down my shovel and ask him what’s up. He says, “Dad, I’m in alot of pain down there.” I saw by the little mans face that my son was playing with himself and needed to finish the deed. So I asked him if he was you know, touching and he said the truth which was yeah. And I said that he had to go and finish and that what he was experiencing at that very instant was blue balls. So, my son instantly registered. I told you, smart boy. He went back in the house and in two minutes flat, came back outside into the yard where I was and he had the most fantastic smile written across his face.

I said, son, welcome to the club.