“Shower Hog” (serio-comedy) 1 Minute

Character Description: Barbara complains to her best friend about how her boyfriend takes way too long in the shower.

BARBARA:

He is worse than any woman I’ve ever known in my life. He takes one hour showers. What could one possibly be doing for the duration of sixty minutes, is beyond my rationale. What takes sooo loooong???

He tells me it’s his only time to be alone. HE THINKS, he says. What the hell does he think about is what I’d like to know. Doesn’t the steam eventually get to him? Doesn’t his skin begin to get wiggly??Do you know I tried to get a little kinky on him in the shower one time. He kicked me out! He wasn’t receptive at all.

Now, that’s weird! What man would deny love making in the shower?! I don’t know…there must be more to it than this. Maybe he was abused as a child. I don’t know, I don’t know…hmmm. Any ideas? What?(beat)You know what? I didn’t think of that, but it makes sense. Maybe he is spanking the monkey. But why? Why when he’s got me, a beautiful, sexy, curvy woman? That’s strange, don’t you think? Should I ask him? Should I just ask him if he’s jerking off in the shower?

I have noticed that he is less horny when he comes out of the shower, no pun intended. I’m going to talk to him about it.