“The Real Thing” (drama) 2 Minutes

Photo Courtesy LE VENT LE CRI

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Monologue Description: “The Real Thing” is a drama about how women get sick and tired of how men approach them in the street in general.

Character Description:  In this monologue, Marcella talks to an audience.

MARCELLA: 

Look!  Men can be absolute pigs.  Not pig in the sense of leaving shit around the house.  No!  I’m talking about sexual dirtiness.

How many times do we see men calling out to women in the streets–day or night–whistling, barking, growling, clapping hands or honking–it is limitless the amount of ways a man can try and “get that ass”. And when there are groups of guys, like three or four, forget about it–there true animalistic behavior and bravado in front of their cronies just gets in the way of their truest selves.

A woman wants a man who is going to be true to himself–a gentleman–not some antagonizing sexual predator–in other words, not an asshole.

Yeah, women want to be made to feel wanted, we want to have attention, that is true–we even crave sexual attention, I mean, we ARE human but not the kind of sexual attention most men display to look like they are cool or whatever.  That’s lame, it’s cheesy and it’s dumb, especially when a woman is walking with their man.  When she already has a man!   Let me tell you how retarded men can be that even when a woman is walking with another man, arm and arm, there are still sly attempts by other men to “get with a girl” which creates drama due to lack of respect amongst men as well as lack of respect with a lady.  Look what happened to DeDo.  

(beat)

That guy was such a gentleman, so charming and handsome and one night when he was walking out of the movies with Tina, his girl, they stabbed him down while they were walking to Dedo’s car because he told them to fuck off when they started saying how sexy his girl was.

(beat)

What is that?!  Men thinking with the wrong head?!  Why can’t you respect a lady, respect another man and respect yourselves?!?!

(pause.)

Us ladies are sick of your catcalls and your, “Yo baby, yo, yo, yo’s” and all your thugging and wanna be gangsta attitudes, when you still live at home with your Mama.  We’re not having it!!!

No self-respecting woman will EVER respond to dog calls.  You guys want to get that ass than you all better learn how to talk to a woman and maybe, jut maybe, if you’re sincere and for real–you might even find something more real, than just tapping some random ass.  Something that can really make you happy inside your own skin–something that can make you feel more like a man.  A real man knows the difference between a piece of ass and a beautiful woman.  A real man knows how to open doors, speak politely, be gentle and understanding, PAY FOR THE DAMN RESTAURANT BILL!  HELLO??!!  A real man knows how to go to work, make his money and take care of his family.  THAT’S a real man and until all you boys grow up–then you will keep living your messed up lives by yourself–cause you won’t ever get the real thing, until you can be the real thing and look at yourself in the mirror!  You damn ignorant fools—Don’t get me started!  Have some class–grow up and make your life right.  When you do you will be making this world right cause you’ll have  a sense of responsibility, honor and self-worth and that’s a man that I’d give my life too!

PEACE!

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