Bits and Pieces

Bits and Pieces is a comedy script where two friends Jennifer and Amy crash parties and wreak havoc wherever they go.  2 Women.  Comedy. 

Bits and Pieces

MILTON:  Excuse me?

Jennifer looks at Milton, a dashing middle-aged man in a suit. Her jaw drops. Milton eyes Jennifer.

Hello…I couldn’t help but notice a glow coming from this corner of the ballroom. Now I see why. I’m Milton.

AMY: Hey Milt, I’m Amy, this here’s Jennifer.

Milton’s eyes remain glued on Jennifer.

MILTON:  Good evening, Jennifer.

JENNIFER:  Hi! Hello there.

MILTON:  Which one is yours?

JENNIFER:  Mine?

MILTON (pointing):  That’s my father, the one in the wheelchair.

JENNIFER:  Oh, is he now?

MILTON:  What about you? Is it your Grandmother?

JENNIFER:  Oh! Oh, yeah, my grams. She’s out there in the wild somewhere.

AMY:  There’s my Carlo. Gotta go!

Jennifer makes eyes at Amy as ‘not to leave me alone.’ Amy bounces.

MILTON:  Can I get you a drink?

JENNIFER:  I’m good. Thanks. (beat) I stopped drinking.

MILTON:  Really? My apologies for asking.

JENNIFER:  Don’t be sorry. It’s not your fault I black out and become a super villain.

MILTON:  How so?

JENNIFER:  Trust me, a few drinks and I’ll turn this party into a world crises.

MILTON:  Where are you from Jennifer?

JENNIFER:  I actually don’t know. When I was younger my family moved around quite a bit. Texas, Arizona, then we went east to Mississippi, Virginia, Georgia and when I got old enough I headed north to New York.

MILTON:  Why New York?

JENNIFER:  I’ve always had the heart of an urban girl.

MILTON:  And how long have you been in New York?

JENNIFER:  Not that long, but long enough. What’s your deal?

MILTON:  My deal?

JENNIFER:  Yeah, come on, who the hell are you? Tell me about yourself.

MILTON:  Well, I’m a philanthropist.

JENNIFER:  What do you philanthrop?

MILTON:  Well, I run a few non-profit organizations for various causes I believe in.

JENNIFER:  Such as?

MILTON:  World hunger, global warming.

JENNIFER:  Righto.

MILTON:  And you?

JENNIFER:  Me? Well, I’m looking for work..as in..I’m a job hunter for people who wish to be employed.

MILTON:  What’s the name of your agency?

JENNIFER:  Oh, it’s Jennifer…Agency.

MILTON:  I’m not familiar–

JENNIFER:  We’re very under the radar, independent type of company.

MILTON:  Ah, I see, behind the scenes.

JENNIFER:  Right.

MILTON:  I admire that. Wish I could run my organizations as privately as I would like, but that isn’t plausible.

JENNIFER:  Why not?

MILTON:  Let’s say it’s hard to walk without being noticed. (beat) Would you like to step out onto the patio with me?

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Bits and Pieces by Joseph ArnoneIn short comedy script, “Bits and Pieces” Jennifer good very well have met her soulmate, but doesn’t fully believe that fairytales could actually exist for her reality.  2 Women, 1 Man.  Comedy.

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