Entirely, As Well

The flip flops of love and hate in a relationship.  For more scenes, scripts and skits.

Bruce: I hate you.

Sandra: I hate you.

Bruce: Yeah but, I really hate you.

Sandra: And I really hate you.

Bruce: Yes, but I really, truly hate you…entirely.

Sandra: I really, truly hate you…entirely, as well

Bruce: If you died the most painful death possible, I wouldn’t mind it.

Sandra: If you were crossing the street and a Mack Truck smashed you flat, I wouldn’t mind it…at all.

Bruce: If you were set on fire, tears of joy would leak from my eyes.

Sandra: If you were scuba diving two hundred feet deep in the ocean and you ran out of oxygen, causing you to implode, I would smile with glee.

Bruce: If you were flying in an air craft and all the engines suddenly failed, causing you to crash into a mountain, I wouldn’t watch the news.

Sandra: If you were lost at sea on a boat, I’d be happy if you starved for days before keeling over and dying.

Bruce: If we were invaded by evil aliens, I hope you would be their first pick for death.

Sandra: If you were walking along a New York City block I would be amused if a bird shat on the concrete, you slipped across it and fell head first into an open sewer drain, plummeting fifty feet underground until smack, you’re gone.

Bruce: Car crash!

Sandra: Sharks!

Bruce: Heart attack!

Sandra: Cancer!

Bruce: I hope you get beat with a bat!

Sandra: I hope you get thrown through glass!

Bruce: I hope you don’t wake up in the morning!

Sandra: I hope you can’t ever go to sleep again!

Bruce: I hope you lose your mind!

Sandra: I hope you lose your penis!

(pause.)

Bruce: I love you.

Sandra: I love you, too.

Bruce: Yeah but, I really love you.

Sandra: And I really love you, too.

Bruce: Yes, but I really, truly love you…entirely.

Sandra: I really, truly love you…entirely, as well.

Bruce: If you died the most painful death possible, I would cry.

Sandra: If you were crossing the street and a Mack Truck smashed you flat, I would be so sad.

Bruce: If you were set on fire, tears of agony would leak from my eyes.

Sandra: If you were scuba diving two hundred feet deep in the ocean and you ran out of oxygen, causing you to implode, I would be heart broken.

Bruce: If you were flying in an air craft and all the engines suddenly failed, causing you to crash into a mountain, I would investigate what happened.

Sandra: If you were lost at sea on a boat, I’d be sick if you starved for days before keeling over and dying.

Bruce: If we were invaded by evil aliens, I hope you would be their final pick for death.

Sandra: If you were walking along a New York City block I would be horrified if a bird shat on the concrete, you slipped across it and fell head first into an open sewer drain, plummeting fifty feet underground until smack, you were gone.

Bruce: Car crash…

Sandra: Sharks…

Bruce: Heart attack…

Sandra: Cancer…

Bruce: I hope you never get beat with a bat!

Sandra: I hope you never get thrown through glass!

Bruce: I hope you always wake up in the morning!

Sandra: I hope you can always get to sleep and have plenty of rest!

Bruce: I hope you never lose your mind!

Sandra: I hope you never lose your penis!

Joseph Arnone

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