Money Doesn’t Grow On Trees

In this monologue, Mom is telling her daughter that she cannot get her a cellphone unless she goes out and gets a job.

MOM: A cellphone?  You are in the fourth grade!  I don’t care if Jenny has a cellphone, her parents are rich and yours aren’t.  What do I look like?  Rockefeller?  And you just cost me money when we went to Mandees.  You needed clothes and that is more important that talking on the phone all day.

What do you need a cellphone for anyway?  You are in school all day and then you come home, you can talk for free from home.  Money doesn’t grow on trees.  Don’t ask me again because the answer is no.  You are not ready to have bills and besides, who do you think will be paying for it?

Family plan?  What family plan?  No, no.  Stop asking, the answer is no.  If you are old enough for a cellphone and want to talk all day, then you are old enough to get a job.  Get a job and then you can get a phone.

Don’t ask me again.

Joseph Arnone

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