Monoscription: Tired of giving his friend the same stupid advice on women, JEFF tells his friend to wake up in so many words.
JEFF: You are thirty-nine years old and you are still asking me advice about a date you are about to go on with some girl from your neighborhood. Come on, man. I’ve been giving you advice your whole life about women and it’s always the same advice I give you. You don’t seem to listen so maybe this will help…why don’t you stop living home with Mommy and Daddy with a bedroom that is eight fucking feet away from theirs? How about that? What self-respecting woman is going to take you seriously when you are still living at the same residency you did when you were a boy at THIRTY-NINE years old?
I told you three years ago to go buy yourself a condo. It’s not like you don’t have the money man. You’ve been sitting on your piggy bank since you were ten. Crack that fucker open and go make a purchase. The piggy is screaming for it’s life! You can’t fit anymore money in that thing!
What is it with you? You a little off? Go buy a place, cut the chord and I guarantee you it will give you a new level of responsibility inside yourself. You can walk around with your chest puffed out a little further and I bet not only will you be slapping alot more skin but you may even find the woman of your dreams. Stop being a bitch and go play ball.