Whores of Sanchez

In this comedy monologue, FRANCESCO SAYS SO warns his new drinking buddy not to mess with a certain group of women who are “owned” by a gangster named Sanchez.

FRANCESCO SAYS SO:  Yo you can’t touch those girls, maaaaaan.  No, no, noooo.  You get fucked in the ass by Sanchez if he finds out you looking at one of his whores, man. You crazy man, you crazy think that way. Trusss me man, I knew a guy who knew a guy who knew this other guy named Raymond and Raymond was boinking a red haired sanchez chick named Rebella and this was going on for months man.  Then one day one of Rebella’s friends ratted her out and you know what happened to Raymond AND Rebella man?  They were eaten up by cougars!  Cougars man!!  Sanchez raises cougars and he fed them both to them yo.  This ain’t no fairytale man.  So make sure that when you see the whores of sanchez, you don’t pay them no mind or else you get your balls torn to shreds by pico the sharp toothed cougar. (beat) Man.

Joseph Arnone


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