In the comedic short scene Another Donnie, the action takes place in the outdoor backyard of a home in middle America when a joke gets played on Donnie.
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Berthal: Donnie, come here and look at this nonsense. What is all this?
Donnie: I don’t know.
Berthal: What do you mean you don’t know?
Donnie: I didn’t do it.
Berthal: Didn’t ask you if you did it. I asked you what is it?
Donnie: I don’t know.
Berthal: Well, look at it! Take a damn look with your own two eyes and see what it is…
(Donnie looks amongst the trash cans and debris)
Donnie: Hold on…that looks like my baseball glove. What is my baseball glove doing there…it’s covered in green goop.
(Donnie picks up his glove covered in green slime)
Berthal: Why you touching it with no gloves? What’s the matter with you?
(Sheriff Mitchell enters)
Sheriff Mitchell: Drop the glove, son!
(Donnie drops the glove)
Oh, hell! We have to take your son in for contamination.
Berthal: What’s that?
Sheriff Mitchell: Contamination. The boy is contaminated.
Donnie: What’s contaminated?
Sheriff Mitchell: I’m going door to door right now, I have the entire police force letting people know and calls are being made to every single person in our town. There is a contamination that’s spreading. A creature on the loose, dropping this green goo and causing people to change.
Donnie: Change? What?
Berthal: Oh my God. What’s gonna happen to my son?
Donnie: Mom! My hand…it’s turning purple.
Sheriff Mitchell: Listen to me now, we don’t have much time! There’s a vaccine at NewBridge Hospital but we can’t wait. In order to save your sons life we have to go pronto! Let’s go, Donnie!
Donnie: Am I gonna die? I’m gonna die!
Berthal: You’re gonna die!
Donnie: Why Momma! Why?!
Berthal: It’s alright son, your Papa and me with just make another one of you is all.
Sheriff Mitchell: That’s true. If we don’t get to the hospital in time, you can always reproduce another Donnie.
Donnie: Another Donnie?! What’s going on? Let’s go now? I gotta live. I want to live!
(Sheriff mitchell and Berthal laugh hysterically together)
Are you both crazy? Please save me! What’s happening?
Sheriff Mitchell: Hold on…I can’t catch my…I can’t catch my darn breath.
Berthal: Shhh, haha, shhh…should see your face son.
Donnie: Is it purple?
(Sheriff Mitchell and Berthal let out a simultaneous LAUGH)
I’m not going to change? What?
Berthal: It’s a job you idiot. We planned the whole thing. Well, I should say your brother.
Donnie: Tommy? How did he plan it if he’s in the war?
Corporal Tommy: No I’m not.
Corporal Tommy: What’s up, little bro?
Donnie: No shit!
(Corporal Tommy and Donnie hug)
Corporal Tommy: I told you I would get you back for what you did to me before I left. Did I get you good?
Donnie: I hate you.
How did you get back?
Corporal Tommy: I fulfilled my obligation to our country and made it back in one whole piece. I’m very lucky.
Donnie: Are you back for good?
Corporal Tommy: For now.
Sheriff Mitchell: I’ll let you all get re-acquainted. I have to head back to the Willis’.
Berthal: Everything alright?
Sheriff Mitchell: Yeah, well, you know Marv…had too much to drink and creating a disturbance again.
Berthal: Don’t know how they do it.
(Sheriff Mitchell and Corporal Tommy shake hands)
Sheriff Mitchell: Corporal…
Corporal Tommy: Sheriff. Thanks for chiming into our little family hoax.
Sheriff Mitchell: You are family.
(Corporal Tommy nods)
Berthal hugs Sheriff Mitchell)
Berthal: Thanks, Marshall.
Berthal: I got my boys back. I have supper almost ready to come out the oven.
Corporal Tommy: What did you make?
Berthal: You’re favorite, honey.
Donnie: I can’t wait to tell Robbie that Tommy is back home!
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