In the short monologue, Blanket Thief, Keith complains about how his girlfriend keeps stealing the blanket sheets throughout the night.
KEITH: I can’t. Every night it’s the same thing and every morning it’s the same story. I wake up cold, shivering from the freezing air because she’s a thief in the night. Every night she robs the blanket right off my body.
It’s why I’ve developed this random cough. (coughs) My lungs can’t take the pressure. I haven’t had satisfied rest in months. Ever since she moved in here and I can’t take it anymore. Maybe this whole moving in thing was a bad idea. I’ve told her a billion times and she says she doesn’t know she is doing it cause she’s sleeping. I mean, there’s worse things in life but I need to sleep better. What am I supposed to do?