Boom Boom, Bang Bang

In Boom Boom Bang Bang, Harelson tells his friend about how he think his “wish” killed his neighbor.

HARELSON:  All morning, every morning for three months straight, there is a consistent boom, boom, bang, bang.  The people next door decided that they were going to install and remodel there entire apartment, which is parallel to mine.  I decided something needed to be done, at least in terms of inquiring as to why three months have gone by and the remodeling hasn’t come to an end.

Yesterday morning, I knocked on my neighbor Joe’s door and I politely asked him,”How’s the remodeling coming along, Joe?” Joe laughs and closes the door on my face.  It was quite humiliating, actually.  Mind you, the guy is three times my size.  I’m a Woody Allen type by the looks of me, so I decided it best not to knock on the door a second time.

But under my breath, as I walked away from the door, I wished Joe sudden death.  The next day, there was no more banging and the day after that and the day after that.  Nothing.  Not one peep.

I almost missed the banging, things got so quiet but then suddenly I saw a row of black limousines in the front street and I found out from Tabitha, Joe’s wife, that Joe slipped at the top of his stairs and snapped his neck.  He died instantly.

I blame myself.  Had I not wished Joe sudden death, this never would have happened.  I feel terrible.  I even arranged to pay for the remaining balance on the remodeling.  It’s the least I can do…after all…I killed the poor guy.

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