I Almost Forgot To Say Thank You

In I Almost Forgot To Say Thank You, HYMAN reaches out to his brother Monty to ask if he can borrow money to support his substance abuse habits.

HYMAN:  Hey man, hey, hey I was hoping–wondering actually, if you can spare me a few dollars, just a few shekels to get through my week.  Believe me, I can make a dollar go a whole week, Monty…ha, ha, ha..you know what I’m saying?  I can buy a snickers bar and cut it up to seven days and survive, heh…how ’bout that?

Water is easy to come by, I just go down to the water fountain at the park and drink as much as I want to…I sleep at the cemetery cause nobody bothers me there..they got these dogs they let out at night but I’ve become friends with them and they actually protect me.  Ha, ha, ha.

Bet you didn’t think I’d become such a waste, huh?  Such an embarrassment to everybody in the family…how’s Mom?  How’s the kids?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, no, no, no…I know you said not to come around Monty, I get it, I do, I get it…you have to keep the moths out.  I understand, you’re my brother, of course I understand…

(picking up money off the floor)

That’s alright, I know ya didn’t want to hand it to me cause I…you keep me longer here when I’m trying to pick it up off the ground…

Oh hey, real quick, you think you can tell me how Mom is doing?  It’s just a question…you can’t tell me?

Yeah, well, that ain’t alright actually, that ain’t good…she didn’t die did she?  Huh?


Okay, okay, good, she’s alive, that’s all I wanted to know, she’s alive cause it’s my mother too you know what I’m saying…I love her too, you ain’t the only one…

I won’t come back, I know.  Yeah, I promise I won’t come back again…arrested?  You don’t gotta…hey, I’m your…you don’t need to call no cops on me, alright?  I’m leaving, I’m leaving…

Oh and thank you for the dollars…I almost forgot to say thank you…

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Joseph Arnone