In this comedic kid monologue, Robert a.k.a. “Mr. Poppin”, stands in his bedroom, talking to imaginary people to live out the hype of who he wants to be. He uses a five pound dumbbell and makes his best attempt at what he thinks is working out.
In his fantasy world, he imagines himself to be a boxer, who happens to be working out at the gym.
ROBERT a.k.a. Mr. Poppin’: You wanna piece of me? You wanna piece of the kid? Yeah? Yeah? What? What? What? Huh? What? What? Run before I smack ya upside ya ahead. YA HEARD?! What? For real…yo, for real!
Yeaaaaaah, that’s what I thought, son. Run when I flex. (he flexes his muscles) Ugh! (he lifts the five pound weight and does a ‘fail’ curl)
Yeah, look at that. Look at that? Muscles be poppin yo. Ugh! Ugh! What you say–Ugh! That’s what I said. Popping. Be popping! Be popping like Mr. Poppin’. Yeah, that’s what they call me. Ya better know…ya better know, Mr. Poppin’. Pop, Pop Poppin’!!! Ugh!
(he shadow boxes)
Yeah! Grrrrrr! Ugh! Grrrrr! Ugh! Grrrrrr! You don’t want this—
(Robert’s father walks in the room. Robert completely snaps out of his fantasy)
Oh hey dad…me? What? No, I’m just, I’m just working out. What? I’m not talking to anyone. No, I no, I mean, I was just talking to myself to get myself into it. (beat) Yeah, I just wanna get into it, into my workout—why are you laughing, Dad? DAD! Why are you laughing?! This is serious! I take this serious, Dad. Leave me alone…I want to be alone!
(father leaves the room)
(Robert listens at the door to see if he hears his father and then…)
…What? Whatch you say dog? Oh, you wanna a piece of me?