In the drama monologue, The Darker Side of Me, Lucky talks about how he crossed over to his darkest self and almost did something horrific.
Lucky: I went there…I kept looking for it, someone, anything…I wanted to release the feelings exploding inside of me because I couldn’t cope with anyone ever making you feel afraid. I couldn’t take it. I had to make those bastards feel what fear was all about.
I waited, outside for hours and hours…no one would come in or out of the house. I took it up with the streets of the neighborhood. I walked hell bent on finding someone who would give me a wrong look, someone who could start in on me, I was begging for it.
…I remember passing a group of men and I stared directly into all of them and they weren’t the kind of men you want to stare directly into but I didn’t care, I didn’t care about my own life, I felt too much and I wanted it so bad, I wanted them to make a move so bad I could taste the blood in my mouth…but they didn’t, they wouldn’t even look at me and when I walked passed them, I felt a sudden sadness because what I was feeling, all this anger I felt, had nothing to do with any of them. They were all innocent men who had absolutely nothing to do with what I had going on inside myself.
It was then that I realized how foolish I’d been. I was willing to throw it all away and for what? For what? I was willing to hurt innocent people for no good reason other than the fact that I was blaming them for something they had nothing to do with.
Slowly, I was able to bring myself back to reality. God knows how close I almost came to destroying everything. I’ve regretted my actions ever since.
I was lucky.