The Last Bit of Sanity

In The Last Bit of Sanity, Baum talks to someone from his imagination.  He makes conversation in order to hold on to his last bit of sanity.

Baum:  Sometimes when my demons overtake me, I hide in the dark and won’t come out, until I can breathe safely again.

Days go by and I rot alone, no food, no water and I begin to stink.  And no one, not one living soul ever comes to save me.

On the surface, I’m a fun loving guy, gentle, charismatic and oh, I have a nice smile, so I’m told.  Good for me.

It’s behind the eyes, it’s what’s inside, what I carry with me that haunts me.  Anguish.  I can’t ever allow such horrible giants to come out of me and make me do things I’d regret.  They know what I am and I know what they want.


You look good.  Nice and shiny.  Always glowing.  Why is that?  Why are you so freaking clean?  Do you bathe?  Yeah, you must bathe.

(mocking)  You have such gorgeous skin!   Do you cream?  (beat)  You make me want to puke on myself.  Smell like a baby.  No adult should smell like a baby.

So, what did you come for?  Money?  Is it more money?  What?  What could it be now?  See if I’m dead?  (singing)  Still here.

You hear me, right?  I’m aware of how I talk, fragmented, like…like someone who has gone bitter but holds on to their reason for as long as they can, before it finally slips through their fingers.

It’s the other guys fault!  Alright?  All I did was try.  I never did nothing I wasn’t supposed to do.

You’re still fat.  Couldn’t lose any weight before you came to visit me?  I guess that’s why you smell so pleasant, to cover up for your fatness.  Doesn’t work…smell can’t cover up fat.

Why do you keep staring at me?  You make me feel like I’m supposed to perform for you?  Is that what you want?  Want me to get up and do a little jig?  Staring at me like I’m being recorded or something.  Talk.  You talk.  You talk.  I’m not saying anything anymore.  I’ll stare at you, see if you like the feeling.

Say something.  Say something!  (beat)  It’s alright.  Forget it.  As long as you’re here…your presence, it’s good to have someone here, even if it’s you and you’re fat but you smell good, you smell good.

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Joseph Arnone