Haven’t ya heard a word I said?

Ricky may have finally pushed his boss Matilda over the edge due to his lack of hard work from serio-comedy scene Bloke on the Dock.

Featured Scene – Bloke on the Dock

MATILDA: You do the woik of half a man.

RICKY: So where’s the other half gone to?

MATILDA: I’ve been wonderin’ that fer years.

RICKY: Is it time for lunch? I’m starved.

MATILDA: The nerve!

RICKY: What?

MATILDA: Haven’t ya heard a word I said?

RICKY: When me stomach’s full, I go better at it.

MATILDA: You’re way too behind to grab any grub.

RICKY: I can eat and woik at the same time.

MATILDA: If you fall behind today, I’m dockin’ your pay.

RICKY: What’s that you say?

MATILDA: You heard me loud and clear.

RICKY: I heard it but I don’t believe it. Ya wouldn’t do that to me would ya Tildy?

MATILDA: You bet your rotten arse I would.

RICKY: But a man needs his pay.

MATILDA: And a business needs good woikers.

RICKY: All this talkin’ is slowin’ me down?

MATILDA: Slowin’ ya down from what?

RICKY: From woikin’!

MATILDA: Ya fired!

RICKY: WHAT??

MATILDA: Remove yourself from the premises.

RICKY: How can ya…fired me?

MATILDA: That’s right.

RICKY: But how have I wronged ya?

MATILDA: Losin’ money.

RICKY: Who?

MATILDA: ME.

RICKY: Noooo.

MATILDA: Because of you I’m losin’ delivery time. Because of you I have unhappy customers and when there’s unhappy customers, there’s dropped accounts. This past month alone I lost three accounts on account of you! THREE! That’s three less mouths to feed around here for men that woik twice as hard as you to feed their families. You are free to go!

RICKY: But I need this job.

MATILDA: And I need me business.

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Scene Summary

In the one act eplay Bloke on the Dock Ricky’s been slipping up on the job and his cousin Matilda has had enough of his shenanigans. 

• Genre: Serio-Comedy / Period Comedy
• Length: ~5 minute scene
• Characters: 1 woman, 1 man
• Themes: work, family, responsibility
• Best For: serio-comedy scenes for actors

FAQ

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Scene Source: Bloke on the Dock

Bloke on the Dock is a drama play by Joseph Arnone, 2026.