In seriocomedy scene from one-act eplay, “Becky’s Night Out”, Becky races to go out on a first date, while her parents tease her.

MOE enters the living room carrying a green olive jar and a spoon.

MOE: Here. Take two spoons of this; it’ll help your indigestion.

JANIE: What is that?

MOE: Green olive juice.

JANIE: Don’t give me that! It’s filled with salt! You trying to kill me?

MOE: It helps to calm the stomach!

JANIE: You’re insane.

MOE: It’s an old family remedy. My mother used to give me this as a boy.

JANIE: And look how you turned out.

MOE: It’s instant. In less than two minutes, your stomach ache will subside.

JANIE: Get outta here with that.

MOE: Can’t you trust me for once?

JANIE: What do you know about remedies, Moe?

MOE: You tried everything else, why not try my remedy?

JANIE: I’d rather suffer in pain.

MOE shakes his head – goes back to the kitchen.

Enter BECKY from front door entrance. She heads directly for the stairs.

JANIE (to BECKY): Woah, woah, woah! What are you doing?

BECKY: Not now, Ma. (heading upstairs)

JANIE: That’s how you enter my house?

BECKY (shouting from upstairs): I got Gino waiting outside!

JANIE: At this time of night?

Enter MOE.

BECKY: It’s only eight o’clock.

MOE: What’s she wearing?

JANIE: Hardly anything.

MOE: Where you off to, Becky?

JANIE: And who’s Gino?

BECKY: Gino, from the pizzeria!

JANIE: I don’t know no Gino. (to MOE) You know a Gino?

MOE: Gino who?

BECKY: From the pizzeria!

MOE (to BECKY): Which one, Rosa’s?

BECKY: No, Carlos!

MOE looks through the window.

MOE: That him in the car?

BECKY: Dad, don’t embarrass me!

MOE: That him?

BECKY: He’s in the car!

MOE (to JANIE): Should I go out there for a closer look?

JANIE: You look like a mad man – not even dressed.

MOE: He looks typical.

JANIE: Let me see.

JANIE stares through the window with MOE.

She picked him?

MOE: What?

JANIE: No, nothing. I thought it was the other guy she told me about, the cute one with the green eyes and smile. Looked like he was in love with her; he had dimples. She picked the rude one with the ears, can’t believe it.

MOE: Ears? Oh no way, that’s Gino dumbo ears!

JANIE: Shh! Shh! Don’t embarrass her.

MOE: You gotta be kidding me.

JANIE: It’s only a date.

BECKY comes crashing down the stairs in a rush.

MOE: Oh! What’s the matter with you?! Go easy!

BECKY: Byyyye!

BECKY leaves through the front door.

MOE stands at the front door looking on. He waves.

MOE: Dumbo ears? Yeah! (waving) Bye. (taps his watch) Not too late – I’m sure you can hear me.

MOE closes the front door, laughing to himself.

JANIE: You don’t have to be that way.

MOE: Let me have my fun.

JANIE: Definitely him, right?

MOE: Can’t miss ’em.

JANIE: (sighs) Sssss. She never picks the right ones. All them boys staring at her, and watch, she’ll end up with a moron like Gino.

MOE: Not my daughter. She’s just having a bit of fun.

JANIE: She’s not having her fun, she’s about to settle down with some idiot.

MOE: How’s your stomach?

JANIE: I’ll live.

MOE: Take one small spoon of –

JANIE: GIVE IT TO ME!

MOE: Yeah?

JANIE: All day I gotta hear you! Yeah, give it to me, I’ll take it already. Maybe you’ll shut the hell up.

MOE: It’s like a miracle.

MOE goes back into the kitchen.

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In the one-act eplay, “Becky’s Night Out” Becky misses out on her first date with Gino because her parents were too busy poking fun at him.  2 Women, 1 Man.  Seriocomedy.

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