Fungus Among Us

In this serio-comedic monologue piece, ALEXA has had it with her roommate for never cleaning up after her leftovers in the refrigerator.

ALEXA: Just once I would like to see you clean out the refrigerator Mara. Unbelievable! You think you would have some freaking decency. Why do I always have to do it?! It’s like you don’t care. You simply don’t care if we have people over and they look into our fridge! It’s disgusting. Just once I would like to see you clean out the refrigerator. YOU’RE the one who spills the ice tea or the soda! YOU’RE the one that loves keeping food wrapped up until it becomes moldy!

Are you waiting for it to get up and walk itself out of the refrigerator? Are you? Really?  Am I the only one responsible enough to take a minute out of my day and clean up once and awhile?

(pulling “items” out of the refrigerator)

Look at this stuff. Look at this! Macaroni and Cheese that has been in here three Macaroni and Cheeses ago! No wonder we don’t have enough bowls and dishes! No wonder! Look at this Mara, a dish of left over chinese food that has all kinds of yellow, blue, green and white mold on it! Beautiful! That looks appetizing. Oh wait! What about this?! Look at this Mara, some left over chicken fingers from, God, must be six months ago at least.

(she smells the food and GAGS)

You have got to be kidding me, right? I am NOT cleaning it up this time. YOU CAN! You can clean it all up and wash out the refrigerator, actually, SCRUB the inside of the refrigerator from God only knows what else because I just had my nails done and I am NOT ruining them!

(storms out of the room)

  • To read the full one-act ePlay, find purchase link below:

In this one-act play, ALEXA and MARA team up to battle it out with what they believe to be a possible creature residing in their refrigerator.

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Joseph Arnone